Recently I realized that, as parents, we participate in and overhear an overwhelming amount of insane exchanges. Here are some of ours:
Daddy: What kind of dinosaur is that?
Drew: A Tyrranosaurus Rex.
Daddy: That's right. And what's this dinosaur?
Drew: A Spiny Tyrranosaurus.
Daddy: No, that's a Stegosaurus.
Scene: I see Drew climbing up the counter while wearing his Buzz Lightyear costume.
Drew: It's okay. I have super climbing powers.
Olivia: Hey, Sandy? What if we named the baby Destiny?
Mitch: That's the kind of name that means you didn't go to college, Olivia. I know, what if we name the baby Toby, Sandy?
Olivia: That's the kind of name you name a dog, Mitchell.
Drew: Mommy? Are you awake?
Me: (I say nothing. I'm not stupid.)
Drew: Mommy? Mommy?! MOMMY!!
Me: Jesus, Drew! What? !
Drew: Um...do monkeys wear hats?
And for now...