16 August 2009

Pretty Mommy, Why Are You In Sweats?

I’m wearing flip flops. And they aren’t wedges, sparkly, or from Banana Republic.

Have you set your coffee cup down? Do you, in the words of the great Mike Myers on SNL, need to “Tawlk amongst yaselves”? Probably not yet, you don’t. But now, I’m going to say something that might prompt you to.

I’m also wearing yoga pants.

Now, you may be thinking that I’m sitting in front of my home computer, which is absolutely true. Earlier, though, I wore them through Target. I wore them through Target with my hair in a ponytail. Not even a cute holder for the ponytail, just a plain elastic band. Which, to be honest, is kind of unfair, because I have really good hair.

And I’m sick of it.

I love being able to do things with my hair. I can curl, straighten, and blow dry with a round brush to my hearts content. However, the only person here to see it is Scoob, and it’s just as easy for him to put American cheese slices into my uncoiffed hair. So I just don’t. The want for the Early Thirties Mom-Bob is creeping its way into my ponytail covered, unhighlighted dome and scaring the heck out of me.

It’s not just the hair, people. Although I have begun to revere yoga in an unhealthy way, count calories until my eyes cross, and am taking diet pills, I just can’t seem to get the change I ache for.

Although I’ve been assured that wanting some serious image change is all part of the early motherhood-life crisis, I can’t help but feel a bit…well, off about it. I’m sitting in a chair at my own pity party, and it’s a bit depressing. I know. You can stop reading if you want, and I will completely understand. It’s just that, well, I feel like a frump, and I don’t know how to break the mom jeans, ponytail head, flip floppy cycle from hell.

How do others break the stay at home mom ho hums? Anyone?

5 comments:

Tawnia said...

Welcome to my world. I find the best cure is to stop watching televsion. Those bitches always look flawless, and it's not real. You as I have are being baited by the unreal(stop watching the real housewives of atlanta sisita). The fake, the personal trainers, hairstylist, make-up artist, and the I have a nanny lie! You are a real woman, with kids, a house, college, a husband, and a life. Go easy on yourself. You are perfect just as you are:) As soon as you accept that you will feel as beautiful as you really are! And yes you lucky bitch you have great hair! Don't do anything drastic until you feel better. Beauty really does come from the inside out, I know sounds cliche', but it's true! I am right there with you and I know how you feel. You are beautiful, you just need to see it, and then you will feel it:)

Love Tawnia

Ally Jay said...

You know, I long for the same....something to get me out of this rut; something to change the way I feel when I wake up in the morning...something that makes me wanna put on some boot cuts and a sandal wedge and a v-neck tee with a yellow scarf...I think you have to find it inside (way too deep btw) and say to yourself that you are worth it no matter who sees it. Because, let's face it, we all feel prettier when we're not in yoga pants. But either way, it doesn't really matter if you don't feel like it bc you are beautiful the way you are-yoga pants and all and I have colored elastics for your gorgeous hair :) .

Ashley said...

I got a night job, but the whole day just drags on. I feel ya honey, I want to look pretty too. Maybe we should all start a club

LucyCooper said...

Holy fright!! Great minds think alike :o) I haven't done any actual yoga in my yoga pants in months. But honestly, I think I must have some of that Sensory Integration Dysfunction thing, because I can't stand any clothing that's not stretchy and comfy.

And I too, refuse the mom haircut. My only hairdressing decision is, "Hmmm- high, bouncy, perky ponytail, or low, mature, demure ponytail?"

Anonymous said...

Many thanks.